You cannot make bitcoins with a shitty CPU, or a shitty GPU. You can try, but the difficulty is too high, and is always increasing.
If this is a new concept to you, imagine:
When I first received my BFL Jalapeno (ASIC 5G mining rig) and started mining, to the time I sold it, the difficulty had increased enough that I was seeing a .05 BTC gain in twice the time. So now you can imagine how eventually only people above a certain mining speed will be profitable.
At the next difficulty estimate, an i7 with free electricity mining all the time at 8 MH/s would make about 9 US cents in a month. Since the difficulty will probably go up again in less than two weeks, make that less than 2 US cents per week. Since very few people actually have free electricity it's not worth it.
Okay, in the hypothetical world where 1 satoshi is worth some huge amount of USD more than it presently is, if you suck up the electricity cost now (which I believe would be less than $1 USD per day for an i7) you can get a few satoshi that may one day make that up-front cost worth it...
Whether you can actually get a single satoshi from a pool is another story. If the pool uses PPLNS, you might not ever. I think most would object to you for being misleading. If you want bitcoins, buy them, or get an ASIC miner and don't use a sucky-ass CPU or GPU.
By the calculations above, you would be far, far better off just buying Bitcoins on an exchange than you would be mining them with non-free electricity.
If this is a new concept to you, imagine:
When I first received my BFL Jalapeno (ASIC 5G mining rig) and started mining, to the time I sold it, the difficulty had increased enough that I was seeing a .05 BTC gain in twice the time. So now you can imagine how eventually only people above a certain mining speed will be profitable.